Week 3: One Room Challenge

We are half way through our One Room Challenge! I have to admit I did not do much this week. The larger items are checked off the to-do list. I am now just working on finding a bookcase, which I will share in two weeks….hopefully!

Today I want to share some of the fun textiles and accessories I added to the room. Pillows have been a struggle and I am still not sure I will keep a few of them, but I will share what I have so far. One pillow I know for sure I am keeping is this one(similar) from Danielle Oakey:

danielleoakeyoillow

 

 

I picked up these from Target about a year or so ago in blush(no longer available). These are the ones I am not sure about. For now they get to stay. Check into week six for their final fate!

target pink pillow

 

and this one is from HomeGoods.

TJmaxx pillow

target lamp

This lamp I got over a year ago from Target on clearance, but it is still available.

mcm table amazonI originally bought this side table for my Living Room, but I was not digging it. Thankfully, it goes so well with the style of this room.


Unfortunately, the mirror is no longer available at Target. It was such a great piece. I hope they bring it back. I purchased many items awhile back or brought from my previous home. Also, the black and white throw is not available. I apologize!!!

I could not grab a pic off of IKEA’s website of the Fiddle Leaf Fig, but included the link. If you are wondering about the quality and look, I would say pass. It is on the small size which is fine for this room. The leaves are hard to manage and one broke off as soon as I touched it. The leaves are pretty soft and don’t look too fake. I would say for the price it is not horrible, but I would definitely go with a larger one for any other room.


Next week I will share some wall art and desk accessories and a bit more of the room! Hope you are enjoying following along. If you are interested, check out the other talented people involved over at Calling it Home or using the hashtag #oneroomchallenge on Instagram.

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Summer

Making Meaningful Relationships

Making Meaningful Relationships

Last week I dug deep into a struggle of mine. I talked about playing pretend and how lying at an early age turned into destructive behavior as an adult. I was reading in The Emotionally Healthy Woman(which I highly recommend) about lying to others and how it really is a self-esteem issue. We lie to look better to others or even to ourselves. We can become something we are not proud of and begin to make up lies about who we are.

In the book, they discussed a study on lying. It went on to say that “In the study, people became increasingly engaged in managing how others perceived them, and as a result, said more and said things that were not entirely accurate.” This reminded me of times when I wanted to fit it. I would start talking more and saying things that I did, that were not true. For instance, if a group was talking about going skiing. I would join in saying I know how to ski and I love it. When in reality, I only went once, years and years ago and I’ve not gone skiing again since! I so badly wanted to fit in and add to the conversation. I mean I did go skiing once, it was just a white lie about loving it and really knowing more than a 10 minute lesson could offer. I so longed to look cool, I compromised my integrity.

Dwelling on the idea of self-esteem, I wanted to dig deeper into how to make meaningful relationships by being real. We all want to have friends who can tell us we have something in our teeth or our new hairstyle is not that cute! When coming from a loving friend, it doesn’t hurt so much. We long for honest conversations that will help us grow. We are all learning from each other and just as in a marriage, when there is love and respect, critiques are taken better.

There will always be conflict in a relationship. That is a given. We are all different and imperfect people. It would be a boring world if we all agreed on everything. The key is how we respond during conflict. I need to quote The Emotionally Healthy Woman again, because it is filled with so much goodness. The author writes “Conflict is normal, important, and necessary when close relationships enter into a new cycle of growth and maturity”. I see that in my own relationships. Most of my life I did not have any conflict, because I did not communicate well and was afraid of the truth. There was nothing to have conflict over, because I was not expressing my feelings about anything. Boy did that change after I got married! It took awhile though. My husband and I thought we were an anomaly. We never fought. But, in reality, we never communicated. Once we figured that out, we had more conflict. It was good though. Through the conflict we were better able to understand each others side, instead of assuming what the other person was thinking. We definitely grew in our maturity and in our relationship.

So, what does all this look like in our friendships? And how do we make meaningful relationships?

I believe it all boils down to being real. Like I mentioned last week my church is big on the idea of being real with ourselves, God and others. If we are not real in any of these areas it is going to effect our relationships. Being real deals with a whole lot of grace! A few months ago I put together a list of things that I wanted in a friend. Now, if my friends are reading this, please don’t think you are not good enough. I have some incredible friends who I can always count on. My list was actually pretty silly. I realized I chose friends who did not like the same things as me and my list was all about what I liked and wanted others to like as well! One of my best friends, hate shopping! Probably just as much as my husband hates it. She also does not use Pinterest, Instagram  and has no interest in Interior Design. All of my favorite, but she is one of my favorites. I soon saw that God was teaching me to love everyone. They did not have to look like me, act like me, or be interested in the same things for me to have a great friendship. We could still learn from each other and be real with each other.

Meaningful relationships don’t have to all look the same. I have friends I grew up with who are nothing like the friends I’ve made through church. But, we could all get together and have a great time. Learning that we have all been created as unique individuals is also a grace thing. Now, there are certain people that we will just never vibe with. I have met people, who I know for a fact, I can’t be friends with. Like those who hate donuts or if you hate driving too…we either can’t go anywhere or can’t be friends. If you do not know all the words to at least one Mariah Carey song…this friendship may not work! And finally if you can’t laugh and be silly you may need to find another friend tribe.

Be interesting ed

We were made for connection. Something I have always struggled with as a shy person. I am slowly learning that not every friend needs to like everything I like. It’s going to be ok. Instead of judging, I need to be compassionate and filled with grace. To learn about people and to be interested. I love the saying, “Be interesting and interested”. We all are in this crazy life together and need our friends by our side. Friends who are loyal, honest and loving. Do you have this in your life? A good friend is such a treasure. I am thankful for the few I have and for God giving me a new perspective on what being a good friend looks like. I am still learning. It has been a long and slow process, but thankful none the less. If you struggle with making meaningful relationships, I would suggest being the friend you want. Work on yourself and I am pretty sure the friends will come.

Summer

Week 2: One Room Challenge


I have been a busy bee painting our guest bedroom/office this past week. Choosing a wall color is one of the most important choices in my opinion. It sets the whole tone for a room. I originally thought I would step away from my typical white. I actually went so far as to buy samples and then a whole gallon of a light grey. But, once I started gathering ideas I knew I had to stick with white! I went with the paint color “White” by Behr…I know so adventurous! Just in case you are curious I mentioned this in my last post, but we have oil based paint on all of our walls. So I primed them first and the new paint went on great. I learned my lesson from a previous painting project in our bathroom,  that paint with primer alone does not end well! I basically painted my whole bathroom only to have it all peel off!

I’m going for a more Boho look which can either be pretty neutral or filled with a lot of color. I chose a rug that was full of color so, that really swayed my decision to go with white. I am so glad that I did. My overall look is Boho Glam/Chic so, to add some glam I searched for different wall treatments. I originally wanted removable wallpaper. I immediately went to Walls Need Love. After figuring out how much I needed I behaved myself and decided to go a different route. Our guest bedroom/office is the least used room in our home(after this makeover, maybe not). I decided to save the wallpaper for our Master bedroom which is next on the list. I spied these removable wall dots from Walls Need Love. I absolutely love them. I love that they are easily removable. I originally spaced them too closely, but it was easy to remove a few and create more space between the dots. If you are looking to make a statement, but don’t want to spend hundreds of dollars on wallpaper, this is a great option. They have other designs too, like stripes!



Next week I’ll be sharing the fun stuff like pillows, curtains, lamps and accessories! Most of it is from Target surprise, surprise! I did venture out and get a pillow from a shop I’ve been dying to purchase something from. See ya next week! Oh and for more behind the scenes follow me on Instagram! @thedaysofsummerblog

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Summer

Playing Pretend

Untitled design

When I was younger I liked to play pretend. I had pretend friends, pretend tea parties and even dressed up as pretend people. I would escape reality and fall into a fun pretend world. I controlled the setting, what my “friends” said and was the author in my pretend story. Unfortunately, as an adult, this pretend world did not end. My childlike activities continued into my adulthood.

Since I was shy, I often found myself alone. I would go over situations in my mind over and over again. Many times it led me wondering what was reality and what was pretend.  As a child this was ok. It was innocent, but as an adult it was me not participating in the real world and becoming selfish with my thoughts and fearful of being real.

My family has always had a history of pretending. These pretend games were passed down. I hesitate calling them games as that word is associated with fun. Pretending as an adult isn’t fun. It really is a problem. That problem was being authentic. My family liked to pretend to be perfect, when their home life was anything but. They liked to pretend to be something they were not, by hiding under fur coats and diamonds, while they couldn’t provide food for their family. These things all gave a feeling to others that they had it all together.

I found myself playing that game soon enough. Being real meant being honest and I wasn’t mature enough for the honest game. Playing pretend, left me lying about who I was and kept me very distant from people. The innocent pretending of my childhood became destructive lying in my adult years. I began to see it hurt those I cared and loved for. When I met my now husband it did not stop. I so desperately wanted him to think I was perfect. I put up a front. I lied about things…big things. It eventually ate at me so much I had to tell the truth. And this is so cliché, but the truth really does set you free. When you are honest, people respect that. No pretending. Honesty leads to intimacy. When I began to love the real me and share my real self, others opened up more and shared more with me. I did not feel so alone. I loved better.

This is still a battle. I am still learning to love the real me. I attend a church whose mission statement is to Be Real with Ourselves, God and Others. I have to say this made me very uncomfortable for a while. Everyone was so real and they were making real connections. Something I have not completely conquered yet. I had always judged people   who were themselves. I realized I was so uncomfortable because it meant I had to open up and possibly be honest and others would see the real me. That can be scary, but as I said before honesty leds to true intimacy. When we are vulnerable in front of others it creates a bond like no other.

In 1 Samuel 16:7 God tells Samuel He “doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart.”

    It’s easy to try to distract others by looking like we have it all together, while we are falling apart inside. It can be a reply of “I’m fine”, when someone asks how you are. When really we are stressed beyond belief and not sure how much longer we can keep at this speed. Or maybe we are trying to keep up with our friends and start gathering things. Expensive things. We desperately want to fit in, but we are not able to pay our bills. We are hoping the flashiness of our new things distract from what is really going on. Or maybe we post cute pictures of our spouse and inspirational quotes about marriage while our marriage is close to being over.

Playing pretend. It’s not just a childhood game. We continue the fake, the lies and the hiding into our adult years. Just as we grow out of our childish ways, we should do the same as believers. As I grew in my faith, I realized the sins of my family and myself were foolish.

Ephesians 4:25 So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.”

Colossians 3:9-10 invites us to “Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.”

This can be a difficult process, but as a believer and being renewed it is much easier. I admit I still talk to myself. Probably enough to be committed! I still imagine and play pretend. Sometimes it is healthy and other times it is very destructive. I like to come back to these verses and the truth of God’s word. As I grow in knowledge, I see how much freedom there is in being honest with others, God and myself. Playing pretend needs to be saved for games with my son and not in adult relationships. We all are messy, but we are all loved by a God who wants us to take note on who he is. Being real and honest and not playing hide and seek(lets see how many other analogies I can use with childhood games) will allow you to create more deep and meaningful relationships. Which brings me to the end and my topic for next week’s post!

 

 

 

Summer

Boho Glam Office/Guest Bedroom

Boho-Glam Office_Guest Room

Sofa/Clock/Rug/Dresser(vintage piece-source unknown)

I am so excited that the One Room Challenge is happening the same week I relaunch my blog! It was meant to be! If you are not familiar with the One Room Challenge check out the hosts’ website (Calling It Home) for more details and other sites to follow! There are so many talented people involved.

As some of you may know we just moved into a new to us home in June. So, there is no shortage of projects to do around here! I decided to tackle our office/guest bedroom because it was quickly becoming a dump all room. For the most part I had all the furniture pieces I needed. I just needed to paint and decorate. I did do some rearranging of furniture. The room is pretty small and there are not too many configurations that work. Being that this is a multi-purpose space I had to fit quite a bit into this small space.

I decided to go with a Boho Glam design style. We purchased a sleeper sofa from Mathis Brothers in a dark charcoal. I brought in a dresser that I had been holding onto for years. It is a Henry Link dresser from the Bali Hai collection, which is my favorite designed furniture of all time! It originally was a yellow color, but it was pretty beat up. I decided to go with a semi-gloss white and love how it turned out.

I also had a MCM sewing table that I used for a desk in our previous home. I was debating trying for a larger desk as this table/desk is pretty small, but in the end it really fit the space well.

Without giving you too much more details let me share with you a few ideas and take you along, during the next six weeks, as I transform this room!

img_0556

 


Here is a very awful before but hopefully soon to be awesome after! I went back and forth about which color to paint the walls. I was leaning towards grey and even bought a gallon of it, but once I chose my rug, I decided to paint it white! It’s my favorite! So, on the agenda for this next week is paint! I learned from painting my bathroom that we have oil based paint on our walls! Ugh! So I will need to prime first and then paint. See you all next week with more fun details!

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Summer